Eyebrow Threading

Who knew??!?!?

I am still in awe of a small indian woman who took a simple piece of thread and made my eyebrows nicer than I ever remember them being before.

Talk about low overhead and a smart business plan! I am impressed!

I went to this little spa in St. Laurent (in the St. Louis shopping Center) called Yafa (appropriately named!).

Not the parent I expected to be

This is something that I think about constantly.

With my first child, I was the perfect parent. I had more patience than I have ever known. I was in awe of her every breath. I was in awe of my husband for being her father. I prioritized well and my daughter was always on the top of that list. She didn't watch anything on TV until she was 6 months old (nothing!).

We were perfect parents because she was the perfect child.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Fast-forward 8 and a half years and 2 kids later: Patience is really thin. Working from home (read: I never leave my workplace). My ability to prioritize is hampered by the fact that I really just want a few days off. From work. From home. From LIFE! Put a pretty drink in my hand. Sit me in the sun and let me bake.

What happened to that perfect parent?

The way I see it, it is so much easier to manage life when you are eased into it. First kid. Easy first kid. That helps. With each additional family member comes additional challenges, personality conflicts, eating issues, sleeping issues, pooping issues.

I manage this with yelling.

I never said I manage it well. But yelling has become my go-to thing that they listen to. This is a very big problem in my opinion. I feel like crap after I yell, but I yell because I have already asked them nicely to come downstairs, come upstairs, come to dinner, start homework, get dressed, get in pajamas, get in the shower, get out of the shower,... 4 or 5 times.  I can't ask nicely anymore.  They don't even respond with a grunt when I ask nicely. When the crazy yelling mommy shows up, they come downstairs, come upstairs, come to dinner, start homework, get dressed, get in pajamas, get in the shower, get out of the shower,...

I need help and suggestions to avoid yelling but get them to listen. I need a plan of action that I can stick to.

I'm putting this out there because I know how many parents feel the exact same way. Please post your suggestions, ideas, tricks in the comments so that everyone can benefit from them. We can all try and see what works for us.

I know my kids will be grateful. And so will I.

Did you know Spanx made Swimwear????!!!

And you didn't tell me?!?!?

Somehow, I don't really think this model is actually getting any benefit from the Spanx part of this Swimsuit. 

Don't think she needs it. 

Just sayin'.

Little Accomplishments

little ladybugs.

The Procrastinator's New Year's Resolutions

The New Year has come and gone. We are already February. Well people, it is now time for me to make some New Year's resolutions. I don't usually like to make resolutions. They are just another thing for me to add to my list, worry about, not achieve and then remove from my list with that twinge of failure. This year, I'm basing my resolutions on the things that I've already started that are making me feel pretty incredible. We'll go from there.

1) Re-organize my office to make it more efficient. If I can actually reach my printers, there is a much higher chance that I will be able to turn-around a stationery order in a reasonable amount of time. If I can't even find the printer, I may as well go back to bed. I chose to make printer-hiding virtually impossible by moving it out of my general line-of-dumping-crap reach. It is now on the other side of my office. I have cleaned up enough (thanks to some very generous hubby help) that you can actually SEE my floor. I was able to vacuum without fear of sucking up things unknown. This may seem simple to some born-organized people out there, but for me, it is worthy of shedding some tears of joy.

2) Create a consistent work schedule. I have been trying to do this for years. Working from home definitely has its advantages, but the BIGGEST disadvantage (by far) is the ability to procrastinate at a much higher degree of efficiency than virtually any other job. Also, people don't always appreciate that you actually work. Friends call (I don't have to answer, but I always do. I love my friends), coffee or lunch dates are set (I don't get to hang out with co-workers and I NEED people!), house cleaning needs to get done (hee hee! funny.), and errands need to get run. I just need to set work hours and house hours and stick to them. I've already started with this and it feels good when it works out. Eventually, I will get to my final resolution:

3) Exercise 3 to 5 times a week. It doesn't need to be for an hour. I don't want to set a weight goal. I just want to get exercise into my daily routine. I want to look forward to it (I'm always the dreamer), and I want to feel like crap on the days that I don't exercise. Not that I want to feel like crap. I just want to WANT TO do it. Whenever I get excited about exercising, it lasts, at most, 2 weeks before it evaporates. I want exercise to be an ingrained part of my brain. Is that so much to ask??

I have to say, over the years I have found some amazing sites and tools to help me along on these resolutions - they tend to be the same goals every year, month, week,...

Flylady is one of my favourite kick-you-in-the-ass-and-annoy-you-until-you-get-it-done-with-a-smile-on-your-face website. She e-mails you constantly with a little "project" that you should do. Anything can be done in 15 minutes at a time according to her - and she really makes you see that it can be true. If you listen.

Sparkpeople is another one I love. Their goal is very much in line with my 3rd goal - they want you to move. They don't care how hard, how fast, how long - as long as you get your sneakers on and your heart rate up. Oh. And they want you to eat better too. And be a better friend. No. Really. You get points for helping to motivate other online Sparkpeople "friends". It's like Weight Watchers. But with a better online setup and community. And did I mention that it's free?

Finally, you should all know, I have a dream. One day, when my house is clutter-free, and I'm warming up to run a marathon, laundry all folded and away, dishes dried and sink all shiny, supper ready for when the kids come home from school,....

I can't finish this. I'm laughing so hard that tears are running down my face.

I am who I am.

I just wish that someone else took care of all the housework.

There is such thing as a functional family!!!

So, J and I packed the kids into the car and headed to Toronto last weekend for a family simcha/celebration. We spent the weekend with our cousins and I came away feeling a buzz of happiness. So happy that these people are in my life. So happy that I am related to them. So happy that my kids have them as an example in their lives. So happy that I have them as an example in my life!

Let me not forget - Thank you to J. This is the part of the family that came with marriage that I am so eternally grateful for. The patriarch of the family is J's grandmother's brother. They have 4 amazing children with wonderful spouses. There are 18 grandchildren between them. With all the differences among the children and grandchildren, there is kindness, respect, thoughtfulness and love between them all. They enjoy the time that they are together and the even spend time ALL together every summer.

We learn by example. I am so glad to have these relatives as an example for myself on how to approach family, raise my children, and care for those around me.

It's Wednesday already and I'm still feeling the high of the weekend. How great is that?

Thank G-d

Last Thursday was a hard day for me. In the morning, I found out that an aquaintance of mine was going through treatment for breast cancer. She is in her mid-late twenties with 2 little kids. I spent a good part of the day crying. I would love to say that it was selfless - that I was thinking of her, her husband, their kids - and that was making me cry. That was definitely part of it. But if I was honest with myself, that wasn't the MAIN part.

I was crying because I felt like I was back to last year when J was diagnosed with Hodgkins. We are now standing on the other side -- looking back at a really hard year and SO grateful for all that we have and all the goodness that we saw in others over the course of the year. He has been "all-clear" since February, and hopefully he will stay that way. But I wasn't crying over the diagnosis. I was crying over the process. How draining the entire experience is - and who am I? I am only the support-system! Imagine how much more difficult it is for the patient! I was amazed at how quickly I could be pulled back, and how helpless I could feel. I only hope that I can be as helpful and thoughtful to this family as people were to us.

In this time leading up to Rosh Hashana, I hope that all those who supported us know that it was their help that made it possible to get through hard days. Some friendships formed at that hard time because people got past their own fears of what to say or do. They just talked and did. It made it easier for us that everything was out in the open and up for discussion. Sometimes when people don't know what to say, they don't say anything and they just mourn. Those who get past that initial fear can see the joy and appreciation you learn when you realize how fragile life is.